The Joy of Sex

On lunch today I went down the Chelmsford Public Library, determined to find out what happened to the copy of Those Little Bastads I donated that’s currently listed as "checked in", but in reality, is nowhere to be found. I asked one of the librarians and she said that, if it wasn’t in the fiction section or the new fiction section, it was probably lost. Something occurred to me then that hadn’t before. My book is just like The Joy of Sex.

The Joy of Sex, for those of you who don’t know, was a book written by Alex Comfort that was originally published in 1979. It’s been updated numerous times since, but the original featured hand-drawn examples of various positions and such. This book, once you reached a certain age, was something you sought out in the public library.

I remember way back when, roaming about the library looking for this book. I remember hiding at the end of one of the aisles to peek at it in private. It was eye-opening. I mean, before this book and my first experience with porn I had no fucking idea how fucking actually went down. For the longest time I figured it involved the belly button, and even earlier than that I figured it had something to do with the breasts because, let’s face it, that’s where all young boys attentions are focused anyway.

Well, one day the Chelmsford Library’s copy of The Joy of Sex just up and disappeared. I couldn’t find it anymore. It was quite depressing. I think someone threw it in their bag one day, somehow made it past the metal detectors or whatever those things are, and they just took that book off into the sunset.

I would suggest that my book has suffered a similar fate. Those Little Bastads, even though it is listed as being in and on the library’s shelves, is nowhere to be found. I think some kid really dug one of the sex scenes or something and he just took that book on out of there.

Now I’m faced with this strange predicament. Do I donate another copy? Do I just trust that it will someday show up again? What do I do?