The Last Song

The following reflection was written in 2003, when I was between 25 and 26 years old.


I came back to Bradford the day after I left and I was there to say goodbye to Rachael on her last night as a Bradford student. I was kind of scared to travel up to the fourth floor of Tupelo East (at least, I think it was East) because I was afraid of bumping into Heather and causing a fucking scene. I made it to Rachael’s unscathed though and while she and her Mom packed up her belongings, I began to type something on her computer. I called it “The Last Song (for Rachael)” and fittingly, it would be the last song, the last anything, that I wrote for a very long time.

When I was done with the sappy, but not very good ballad, I printed it out on paper with a gum ball background. I think I printed two copies, one for me and one for Rachael.

I probably helped a little bit with the packing, but probably not enough. Eventually it was time for me to go and I didn’t want to. This was my best friend and she was leaving and I had no idea when I would see her again. I had no idea how I would get through the next two years of Bradford without her. It was just inconceivable to me that she wasn’t coming back.

We had our hugs and I took off and drove home in my Tempo and nothing would ever be the same again. It was the final nail in my coffin. It was time for the most depressing summer of my life, a period of self-reflection I would dub, “The Big Blue Funk of ‘97.”