The following reflection was written in 2003, when I was between 25 and 26 years old.
On 8 August 1996 I was part of an expedition by a group of men into a place I had never been. Together with Ken, Toby, Manso, maybe Adam, and at least one or maybe two others, I ventured for the very first time into a strip club. I got home after midnight and had this to say when I took out my journal in those early morning hours.
Had my first experience at a strip club today. It was Manso’s (KenMills’ friend’s) birthday, so we went in. One girl took a particular pleasure in tormenting me, Dana. She was old enough to be my mother I’m pretty sure, but sooooo fine. Ken ended up paying her to give me a table dance to embarrass me and ohhh my god.
I’m moving to Mac’s II.
That really about sums it up. We went to Macs Two instead of the higher-class Matthews in Tyngsboro because Ken and I, and maybe someone else, were still under 21. Macs Two was 18+ and Matthews was 21+. That’s what made our decision. Manso, whose birthday it was, was already 21 or had just turned 21.
There were lots of attractive women but Dana, who seemed like sort of the den-mother of the bunch, took a particular interest in shy, little me. When everyone else moved closer to the stage, I hung back and at one point she took off some piece of clothing and threw it across the room at me. I was nervous and not smiling. She was trying to remedy that.
Eventually Ken bought me that table dance and Dana conferred with me, letting me know that he’d bought it to embarrass me. Then, out of spite, I decided to just enjoy myself. And God, did I…