Pissed Off

The day itself wasn’t so bad but everything that happened between me leaving work and me getting on the treadmill at the gym conspired to put me in a mood where punching the treadmill for its lack of cooperation seemed like a sensible thing to do. I drove to the gym surrounded by idiot drivers. I did my strength training on the weight machines, surrounded by idiot exercisers hogging all of the machines I needed. And then, when I was ready to do my cardio, all of the machines I usually use were occupied — all six machines. I am a creature of habit and this did not sit well. This was the straw that broke my fat-ass back.

I did about five minutes on the treadmill, the cardio machine I settled for, before I decided I wasn’t doing myself any good as pissed off as I was. The first time I tried it I used one of its preprogrammed settings and when it wasn’t going fast enough I upped the speed and then the fucking thing decided to tell me I couldn’t do that. So, I slapped the stop button and restarted on manual.

I was still so pissed off that by the time five minutes had passed and I had only burned a fraction of the calories I would have burned on my normal machine, even though I felt like I was working twice as hard, that I just pushed the speed button until it was going as fast as possible. I think that was about nine miles an hour. I did it for about a minute before I slapped the stop button again and stomped out of the gym.

After that, I came home and listened to some REM to calm me down and some Run DMC after that to keep me from getting depressed. JonMartin came over to write and we talked, then ate, and then we wrote. That was good. I was tired though and I think my tiredness cut us short.

So, that was today. I’m fucking glad tomorrow is Friday. I can’t handle any more of the office. I need some time off. I have a lot I want to do this weekend and I probably won’t get half of it done but I’ll figure it all out. I have to.