Muthaphucka

I had a really bad day today and I just ended it by screaming at the top of my lungs at the two small pizzas I cooked Stef and I for dinner. I go a little nuts when I’m pushed to my limits and to my limits I was pushed today. But I discovered something boys and girls. I discovered the therapeutic nature of the word, “motherfucker.”

Say it with me boys and girls: “MOTHERFUCKER!” Doesn’t that feel good? Doesn’t that feel nice? Isn’t there something exquisitely comforting about yelling that word as loud as you can?

I am quite fond of the word motherfucker. I use it quite often on days like today. I cannot recall how many times I have called my computer, my monitor, or my lunch a motherfucker. When something makes me angry I yell at it. It’s just in my nature. I don’t yell at people though. Just inanimate objects. They can’t defend themselves.

There is a lack of organization and a lack of managerial competance lately. Lots of projects to be done and very few people to do them. There is no attempt to ration responsibility. People are pushed to their limits and beyond them. If you don’t like it that’s just too Goddamn bad. Shut up and consider yourself lucky you still have a job. There is no sympathy anywhere. No understanding. Every person for themselves. If you fuck up they aren’t worried about how that reflects on them. They’re worried about how they can spin everything to make it seem like it’s your fault. Better you get fired than them.

I’ve been much better about staying calm lately but there are occasions when I do get pissed off. I can’t help it. And when I get pissed off that word comes out. I don’t know what it is about calling something a “stupid motherfucker” that makes me feel better. I’m really not sure what it is but Goddamn if I don’t get a little positive charge when those words spill off my lips.

The problem is, later on I get to thinking… I wonder if an inanimate object can actually be a motherfucker.

But when I start wondering things like that I just call myself a motherfucker and I’m done with it. Cause I can be a motherfucker too. We all can.

Today was a bad day and this is all I have to offer. Motherfucker.