You wanna know why I love Massachusetts? This is why I love Massachusetts… a week ago (you remember the incident with the wasp don’t you?) it was close to 90 degrees outside and tonight… tonight it is snowing. Where the hell else in the world does this happen? We got hardly any snow all winter and here it is, almost May, and we’re getting a dusting. What is that? I’ll tell you what it is… It is pretty darn cool if you ask me.

But that doesn’t mean I’m not still going to apply to grad school in Hawaii. As cool as it is, you can only take so much of it.

Today I determined that the Department of Unemployment and Training or whatever they call themselves is ripping me off. They have me listed as making half of what I made over the last year. This matters because they base my unemployment benefit off of how much I used to make. Because they think I made X amount instead of Y amount, I am being shafted.

Royally fucking shafted.

So I had to send in a letter requesting a hearing on the matter. I don’t know where they got their information. It simply baffles me. I mean… we pay for this benefit people. It’s one of the endless deductions that’s taken out of our paychecks every week. If we’re lucky we never have to use it but when we do have to use it we should be given our fair share. There are, after all, people out there, who have probably never worked an honest day in their lives who are taking more than their share.

Anyways, when I realized this it sort of blew the second half of the day for me. I read the message boards for a while and watched the movie Body Heat, a flick universally praised by the guy who wrote all of the screenplay books I’ve read. I was trying to get inspired but it didn’t work.

Thankfully I had already done most of what I had hoped to accomplish before I had my unemployment realization.

So Massachusetts is great for the weather and it sucks when you’re an unemployable bum. That’s today’s Fortune Cookie offering.

Except Fortune Cookies never offer fortunes anymore. They offer silly little sayings and credos.

But that is an entirely seperate rant, best left for some other time.