Weddings, Bagels, and Chasing Amy - Part Two

New Jersey Bagels are not as special as New York Bagels, but they are certainly better than Massachusetts or New Hampshire Bagels, which are the kind of Bagels I am commonly subjected to when seeking to calm my Bagel craving. Stef and I had Bagels for breakfast Sunday morning in Jersey. It was a big mistake. Why you may ask? Why would it be a mistake if New Jersey Bagels are indeed a better kind of Bagel? Because the exposure to honest-to-goodness real Jersey Bagels has left me jonesing bad. We got them in the town where the wedding was and by the time we had reached Red Bank (about an hour drive) I was craving another. You just don’t understand. That Bagel was f*cking amazing. F*CKING AMAZING! I told Stef we should get some more Bagels before leaving Jersey…

But we forgot.

Which leads to my belief that Jersey Bagels, like New York Bagels are not allowed to leave their state of origin. There is a power to the Bagels made in those two states, perhaps a secret sauce or something that just demands they be consumed before reaching the border. The last time I was exposed to New York Bagels something similar happened. It was the first time I had ever had a Bagel. A bunch of us had gone to Long Island to visit our friend Kerry for New Years, and Kerry’s Mom (who incidentally happens to love me, and knows me only as ‘Charlie Brown,’ which was the little nickname she gave me because of my disposition, but also because of my cheeks…) supplied the Bagels. I loved them so much that she sent some home with us. There were three of us in the car, and I don’t know how many Bagels. And they were all gone before we got out of New York. I swear.

So now I add another craving to my list. I crave the new Kevin Smith film, Dogma... I crave more issues of my favorite comic book, Dawn... I crave new Nine Inch Nails (who’s new single I have just found out will arrive JULY 20TH… YAY!!!)... and now I crave a New Jersey Bagel… Life just isn’t fair.